Yawn. I don't know why I'm so bloody tired these days. Every morning I wake up to see my alarm clock happily telling me its 7.35 and I've overslept again. I think I should probably change the radio station to something more aggressive; Radio 3 doesn't exactly jolt you out of bed in the same way that Radio 1 or Planet Rock might. I'm too much of a coward, though; I've had the horrible experience once too many times of being shaken from my slumber by 50 Cent soundalikes! Maybe I'll just go back to the trusty old 'buzzer'.
What I actually meant to say, though, was that the Barclaycard slide advert is back in its full uncut glory! Including the squeaky library bit. I want a go! I hate it when they start cutting funny ads because they just assume you've seen them before. And going to school/work would be so much more fun if you took the water slide. In fact, I think it'd solve a goodly number of the nation's stress-induced health problems. Unless you're scared of slides, of course. But who has such a stressful job that they could actually get off the slide at the end of an exhilarating ride and still be in a bad mood?

I'm beginning to feel really guilty because my somewhat chubby boyfriend - fastest consumer of an XL Bacon Double Cheeseburger ever - has started going jogging early every morning, eating fruit and joined a mixed martial arts class. Admittedly it's taken him a while to do it, but I called him fat a while ago (before you gasp in shock, he HAD just called me idiotgirl and tickled me mercilessly) so I can only hope I can take the credit for it all. I'm still eating pretty much what I like, though fortunately I don't fancy the chocolate hobnobs at the moment, and doing no exercise at all. I'm the best excuse-maker in all the land:

1. I can't afford to join the gym/classes/buy a Wii Fit.
2. Even if I could, I can't drive and I live in the middle of nowhere.
3. Walking's not always an option as it is really dangerous - there's no path for a good third of the way into the village, and it's a scary road.
4. I hate aerobics.
5. Set and rep exercises make me feel sick because my blood sugar dips, and they also make me look like a fool.
6. I give up way too easily/am very lazy.

I am condemned to be not-fat-but-slightly-too-curvy for the rest of my days :(